rareslash | Long Way Down Chapter 1/?

Title: Long Way Down (Chapter 1/??)
Author: Me (pinkstarrypants)
Pairing: Ewan McGregor/Charley Boorman
Rating: Ugh, 13-15?
Disclaimer: Just fiction. ( Though I got some slashy vibes from their latest series)
Summary: They are off on another trip of a lifetime, will it always be like this?
POV: Charley at the moment.
A/N: Not seen this pairing ever before but I really wanted to give it a go - so please read and comments are love.
Warnings: X-posted, self-beta'd. I know, sorry.

I groaned and turned over as I heard my phone ring, making a stupid beeping sound from the pillow next to me. I didn't even open my eyes before feeling for it and flipping it open. "What?" I asked, voice groggy and slightly resentful because I had just been woken up.

"Hey, Man, you up yet?" An excited, chirpy voice asked down the phone. No, neither do I want to be.

"Gughgnn" I helpfully replied, seeming unable to talk so soon after becoming conscious.

"Aw, did I wake you? Sorry, bud! Just got an idea and really, like, excited - so when can we meet up? Can I come around?" The voice continued to buzz away, not aware of how little I could comprehend due to the lack of actually being that awake.

"Uh, I guess. Like today, you mean?" Still not all that sure of what Ewan was saying. Just that it was him.

"Yeah, if thats okay!" He responded just as freaking happy as before.

"Alright, give me an hour, yeah? I need a shower at least..." I informed my best friend, already worrying about what I would wear, and how stupid my hair looked etc.

"Sure - got to go. The Mrs is calling, See you soon. Byeee!" I was fully awake by now and the last bit had made me feel sick to the stomach with anger. I couldn't understand it, why would Ewan do anything that stupid cow wanted? I closed my eyes again and thought of my beautiful Ewan. He was once mine, back then. When he hadn't wanted to be straight, when he hadn't wanted marriage and kids. Before he had gone on that stupid thing that hadn't even worked, CHOP, Changing Homosexuals into Ordinary People. Bollocks. It made me feel sick with disgust and hatred. And the anger was still there too.

I threw back the covers and heaved myself out of bed, immediately faced with my own image in the mirror. The usual thoughts came to mind "No wonder he doesn't want you- who would?" and "You need to lose weight, get a hair cut, I look older - she hasn't aged." I put myself down every day like this, it's almost become routine, yet it still works. It still makes me feel low, unwanted and desperately worthless. I wanted to look better, I wanted to be funnier and I wanted to keep up with his hunger for life - but with a self-esteem like mine that was dammned hard. I suddenly remembered he was coming over, soon he would be here, smiling that smile that makes my stomach flip a couple of times as well as my heart speeding, these two feelings together always made me feel a bit light-headed too.

I headed towards the bathroom and allowed myself to remember what he looked like naked, when he was in the shower. The last time I saw this was on our famous "Long Way Round" adventure, a year or so ago. It was one of the best times of my life, every day waking up with him, every night holding him, kissing him and sharing an amazing trip with just us. Me and him. Charley and Ewan. So that was the last time we had been together, the last time I had been that close to him, the last time I had kissed his lips and held his hand, amongst other things that I thought about during the long shower.

So he turns up looking - fuck- it was damnned hard not to gawp at the gorgeous man stood in front of me in blue jeans and a navy blue hoody, and those god-damn twinkling naughty eyes. They made him, along with that oh-so -cheeky smile that he used, often against me, knowing the full effect. "Hey Dude!" was the phrase that interrupted my thoughts, along with a powerful hug that made me feel giddy with being so close to him.

"Uh, hey. You okay?" I asked him, just checking that everything was okay, see even when Ewan was upset he would often act like this, well untill we started talking then he would get emotional, even crying in front of me - don't get me wrong only me, no-one else would ever see him cry. So anyway it had been a week or so since I had heard from him so you know anything could have gone wrong, a small and selfish part of me hoping he would realise his mistake and leave her for me.

"Yep." He said with a grin. No such luck, that horrible part of me responded. "Yeah, I'm great. How about you? How you doing?" He asked seeming genuinley interested. Of course he is genuine, I thought. This is Ewan he is genuine, he loves you remember? Hard to.

"Yeah, all fine here. So what did you wanna talk to me about?" Then saw his face light up as remembered why he rushed around here in the first place. I smiled, looking up at his face it reminded me of all the good times we have had together, a new country, a new road, his face always turned into this look of pure happiness.

"Oh god, yeah! So like you remember "Long Way Round"?!" How the hell could I forget? How could I forget the best experience of my life? Three months of just me and him travelling on our bikes? Yeah, pretty memorable.

"Yeah, course." I replied with a smile.

"Well, we should totally do..."Long Way...Down" It would be amazing! Me and you, camera crew, our bikes and off down through...Africa!" He gibbered on like a young child talking about christmas, or their first day at school. "So? What d'ya reckon? Sound good?" Sounded perfect. Just what I needed. I had felt so lost after our last adventure, back to the real world, on my own, without him. Yeah, reality wasn't great without the person you loved most in the world. I had become depressed with the lack of his kisses, cuddles and not being able to see his smile every day.

"Sounds great. So when did you come up with this idea, Einstein?" I teased.

"Uh - last night. I wanted to call you, I was pacing around thinking about it when I woke up the Mrs and she wasn't too happy. So when i said "I've got to call Charley" She was all "You can't, it's three in the morning"I mean, I knew you wouldn't mind but meh, whatever. So here I am, telling you now." Interfering, controlling bitch. He's right, I wouldn't have minded. He can call me any time, even at night, especially at night (that bad part of me whispered).

"Cool, yeah, you could have called. So how much have you planned, then?"

"Oh nothing really, just came up with the idea, you know I wouldn't plan anything without you. We'll do it together, like we always do."